Song review: The Adulterous Rat Song

I don't know what it is called. But lately, it had become contagious in the same way as the bird flu. Hazardous. It's this idiotic song about some kampung rat having an affair with some rice paddy.

I can't really understand Chinese that well, but hell, you don't need a Mandarin scholar to tell you the deep meaning of it. Hereby, I've taken the liberty to help enlighten those who totally don't understand English.(Now, don't you ever say I never do anything for the community anymore)

This rat song is about a horny kampung rat having an adulterous affair with some innocent paddy rice lying around Sekinchan. This union result in a horde of rice paddy scurrying around with 4 legs which looks strangely alike a rat's leg. The descendant of the rat and paddy rice survive by riding the back of a very single minded chicken determine to change the face of planet Earth.

Unexpectedly they forge a lifelong connection, one whose complications, joys and tragedies provide a testament to the endurance and power of love. (Guess where I stole this line from?)

Kilometer by kilometer they travel to the city of Kuala Lumpur. Until one day, a very sympathetic midget basketball player wannabe offered them a speedy ride to where their goal.

I can't remember much after this. What I can remember is that somewhere near the end, there's the sentence "flash of a knife". And it ended with something about a tasty chicken rice.

Yeah, a totally senseless and unromantic song. And yet an innumberable of gAh Bengs are sprouting up everywhere trying to get lucky with their girlfriends by serenading this song. This is it guys, the moment before our country fall into utter chaos with gAh Beng and Lians copulating openly all over Jalan Imbi and a sudden birth of 3 million babies 9 months onwards.

Just like the gAh Bengs, these morally corrupting songs should be banned.