My car have been possessed!!
First, my organizer together with my RM100 MPPJ monthly pass vanish.
Then, the surat sumpah that I made to get the RM50 discount for a new MPPJ pass disappeared.
Both of em, in my car. Call it a coincidence. But I have reasons to believe that my car is indeed haunted.
God damn it!! It means that I should either perform exorcism onto it or some sort of sacrifical ceremony to applease my car. And knowing that it is most likely that my car will share the same temperament as me, sacrificing an innocent goat might not be enough. Most likely I'll need to "lend" Hui Woon's favourite pet hamster(retarded, in Ipoh) or Jess's pet cat(in kuching, where else) to thoroughly applease it. And again, remembering that we might just share the common vileness, chopping off the hamster/cat's head in front of the car might not suffice. I bet I'll need to sprinkle 'em blood all over the car to buy myself some "safe driving" credit from my haunted car.
Now most of you guys have been wondering, why the heck am I still not tied down with any decent girls out there. Here's the answer mates. My car is haunted. It eats up anything that is important to me. Including girls. My last date ended in a disastrous manner. The poor girl got eaten by my car. And I spent 3 days just to clean off the bits of bloods and bones from my bloody car.
Yeah, now that answers the question of why is Ngiam still single after all these while. No, I'm not gay. Or have sworn a vow to serve a temple for the rest of my life. And neither I am a eunuch (as most of you have been speculating behind my back).
It's my car.
Then, the surat sumpah that I made to get the RM50 discount for a new MPPJ pass disappeared.
Both of em, in my car. Call it a coincidence. But I have reasons to believe that my car is indeed haunted.
God damn it!! It means that I should either perform exorcism onto it or some sort of sacrifical ceremony to applease my car. And knowing that it is most likely that my car will share the same temperament as me, sacrificing an innocent goat might not be enough. Most likely I'll need to "lend" Hui Woon's favourite pet hamster(retarded, in Ipoh) or Jess's pet cat(in kuching, where else) to thoroughly applease it. And again, remembering that we might just share the common vileness, chopping off the hamster/cat's head in front of the car might not suffice. I bet I'll need to sprinkle 'em blood all over the car to buy myself some "safe driving" credit from my haunted car.
Now most of you guys have been wondering, why the heck am I still not tied down with any decent girls out there. Here's the answer mates. My car is haunted. It eats up anything that is important to me. Including girls. My last date ended in a disastrous manner. The poor girl got eaten by my car. And I spent 3 days just to clean off the bits of bloods and bones from my bloody car.
Yeah, now that answers the question of why is Ngiam still single after all these while. No, I'm not gay. Or have sworn a vow to serve a temple for the rest of my life. And neither I am a eunuch (as most of you have been speculating behind my back).
It's my car.
decreed by ngiam at 3:13 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home